Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Melon Update
According to researchers, the bitter melon is said to help treat HIV infection, prevent and treat malaria, and stimulate digestion. Well, a few hours have passed since my meal, and I've come to realize that "stimulate digestion" is just a delicate way of saying "nuclear diarrhea". I'm considering taking a fire extinguisher in with me on my next trip to the bathroom.
Bitter Melon
So, I was flipping around the TV the other day, and caught one of my favorite shows, Andrew Zimmern's Bizarre Foods. To my delight, he was featuring Japan in this episode, and was traveling all around the country, sampling all sorts of exotic edibles. He eventually ended up in the southernmost Japanese island of Okinawa, whose inhabitants are known for their healthy lifestyles and long lifespans. In fact, Okinawa has twice as many centenarians per capita as the United States, and many of the people attribute their good health to the "bitter melon" or goya chanpuru. I was really eager to try it, and immediately searched on youtube to find a decent recipe. Anyway, this is what I came up with. Hysterical.
Well, the talking dog really moved me, and even though it was raining torrentially outside, I rushed to the local Asian market and picked up all of the ingredients - bonito flakes, miso, the melon, tofu, etc. I also had an awkward exchange with the butcher while trying to buy some pork shoulder. The recipe calls for 3.5 ounces of pork, but for whatever reason, I was only able to buy the whole shoulder - the butcher wouldn't cut it up for me. He actually laid a few of the shoulders on the counter and let me pick one. I felt like a dick telling him to fuck off and put them back in the display, so I reluctantly picked out what appeared to be the least massive of the lot. It weighed in at just under 6 pounds. Great. Who cares, though - I was just minutes away from everlasting life! I lugged all my crap back to my car in the rain and trucked home, eager to try out my new exotic dish.
When I got home, I lined up all of the ingredients:
Miso? Check.
Bonito Flakes? Check.
Soy Sauce? Check.
Bitter Melon? Check.
Enough pork to feed a fucking village? Check.
Eggs? .........
EGGS????
For whatever reason, I assumed I lived in an average American household that considered eggs to be a staple and had some around at all times. I was wrong. Sigh. I thought about going back out, but the End of Days weather and my grumbling stomach dissuaded me, and I looked up another recipe. I ended up settling on a stir fry consisting of the melon, dried anchovies, and minced garlic. Although my house now smells like a garlic fried fishfuck nightmare, my hunger was satiated, and I added years to my life. Of course, I now have a mountain of pork in my fridge that I have to find some use for.
One Douchebag? Check.
Well, the talking dog really moved me, and even though it was raining torrentially outside, I rushed to the local Asian market and picked up all of the ingredients - bonito flakes, miso, the melon, tofu, etc. I also had an awkward exchange with the butcher while trying to buy some pork shoulder. The recipe calls for 3.5 ounces of pork, but for whatever reason, I was only able to buy the whole shoulder - the butcher wouldn't cut it up for me. He actually laid a few of the shoulders on the counter and let me pick one. I felt like a dick telling him to fuck off and put them back in the display, so I reluctantly picked out what appeared to be the least massive of the lot. It weighed in at just under 6 pounds. Great. Who cares, though - I was just minutes away from everlasting life! I lugged all my crap back to my car in the rain and trucked home, eager to try out my new exotic dish.
When I got home, I lined up all of the ingredients:
Miso? Check.
Bonito Flakes? Check.
Soy Sauce? Check.
Bitter Melon? Check.
Enough pork to feed a fucking village? Check.
Eggs? .........
EGGS????
For whatever reason, I assumed I lived in an average American household that considered eggs to be a staple and had some around at all times. I was wrong. Sigh. I thought about going back out, but the End of Days weather and my grumbling stomach dissuaded me, and I looked up another recipe. I ended up settling on a stir fry consisting of the melon, dried anchovies, and minced garlic. Although my house now smells like a garlic fried fishfuck nightmare, my hunger was satiated, and I added years to my life. Of course, I now have a mountain of pork in my fridge that I have to find some use for.
One Douchebag? Check.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
More Grinding
Not a whole lot of news - basically just been grinding sng's as much as possible, and doing pretty well. Im up to being able to comfortably play 9 games at a time, which has really helped me put in some substantial volume. In fact, 9-tabling helped me reach a little goal I set for myself for November.
Pokerstars has a VIP program where players are given certain perks depending on the amount of play they put in every month. I generally don't put in a ton of volume online, and when I do, it's usually to play tournaments, which really don't help out your VIP status much. Anyway, in November I decided I was going to try to make the Gold VIP level on Pokerstars, which I had only made previously once before (like 2 years ago when I was playing a lot of Omaha H/L). Normally, this wouldn't be that tough for me, but because I had waited until the middle of the month to start shooting for this, I had to put in a pretty sick amount of hours. Also, with Thanksgiving getting in the way, I'd lose a couple of days' playing time that would be spent with friends and family.
Anyway, as the end of the month approached, things were looking pretty bleak. In order to meet my goal, I'd have to play about 240 sng's in the last 3 days of the month. That's 80 a day. Each set of 9 takes about an hour, so, 9 hours of 9 tables for 3 days straight. Although it may not sound that tough (hell, I've put in 26 hour live sessions before), let me assure you 9 hours straight of 9 games at a time can make you want to rip your eyes out. Either way, I figured I had to at least try.
That Friday I woke up early , had some breakfast and tea, and began at noon. At 9:20 pm I was done, having played 85 $16 sng's. I ran pretty well, and ended up clearing about $250 for the day, which is probably what kept me motivated to play the following two days. Although I ran like dogshit on Saturday and Sunday, I was able to finish up at 11:30 pm on Sunday, with about a half an hour left in November. Even though it was just a dorky little personal goal, I was really proud that I buckled down and made it happen. It also occurred to me what a great way this is to force yourself to put in long hours. It's pretty unrealistic to set any monetary goals in poker, but this VIP program really motivated me to play a high volume of sng's. And, if you're a winning player, you just have to force yourself to put the time in and make correct decisions, and the money will come.
Pokerstars has a VIP program where players are given certain perks depending on the amount of play they put in every month. I generally don't put in a ton of volume online, and when I do, it's usually to play tournaments, which really don't help out your VIP status much. Anyway, in November I decided I was going to try to make the Gold VIP level on Pokerstars, which I had only made previously once before (like 2 years ago when I was playing a lot of Omaha H/L). Normally, this wouldn't be that tough for me, but because I had waited until the middle of the month to start shooting for this, I had to put in a pretty sick amount of hours. Also, with Thanksgiving getting in the way, I'd lose a couple of days' playing time that would be spent with friends and family.
Anyway, as the end of the month approached, things were looking pretty bleak. In order to meet my goal, I'd have to play about 240 sng's in the last 3 days of the month. That's 80 a day. Each set of 9 takes about an hour, so, 9 hours of 9 tables for 3 days straight. Although it may not sound that tough (hell, I've put in 26 hour live sessions before), let me assure you 9 hours straight of 9 games at a time can make you want to rip your eyes out. Either way, I figured I had to at least try.
That Friday I woke up early , had some breakfast and tea, and began at noon. At 9:20 pm I was done, having played 85 $16 sng's. I ran pretty well, and ended up clearing about $250 for the day, which is probably what kept me motivated to play the following two days. Although I ran like dogshit on Saturday and Sunday, I was able to finish up at 11:30 pm on Sunday, with about a half an hour left in November. Even though it was just a dorky little personal goal, I was really proud that I buckled down and made it happen. It also occurred to me what a great way this is to force yourself to put in long hours. It's pretty unrealistic to set any monetary goals in poker, but this VIP program really motivated me to play a high volume of sng's. And, if you're a winning player, you just have to force yourself to put the time in and make correct decisions, and the money will come.
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